Fair warning, I really like
fake chocolate diet drinks. They don’t look
very appetizing. Like you can tell, like,
they’re settling on the top. I love tasting stuff.
I’m excited. [impending doom music] I guess I’ll get started. It smells like- like a
combination of maybe, like Play-Doh and cacao? If you know chocolate,
you know what cacao is. It smells like the bottom of…
uh, a Lucky Charms box? Like, just the
marshmallows. Ew. It’s really sweet. Not bad…
not bad. This one is really sweet but it’s like that
NutraSweet-flavored taste and I actually really
kind of like it. Doesn’t really have a smell
to it. That’s concerning. This one stinks,
like rotten milk, but it kinda looks like, um…
a milkshake a little bit. B is bubbly…
already. Oh. Oh, that’s bad. Oh. Oh, that’s bad. It tastes like spit (laughs). There’s really
nothing to that. This one’s the
prettiest color, I think. This would be a nice color for,
maybe like an accent wall or a couch in your living room. That’s not bad! Oh my god! It has a canned taste to it.
It’s not really that chocolaty but it’s not
really watery either and it’s kind of… bland. It tastes like there’s almost, like, an alcohol inside of it. That just tastes
like chocolate milk. That one’s fine.
I would drink that one. It wasn’t horrible, you know?
I can give this to a baby. This one doesn’t even smell
right. Doesn’t even look right, if you really
look in there. It smells… weird. It’s- it’s bubbling. That’s…
that’s always a good sign. This one’s really
dark and, uh, foamy. D is bubbly and has a layer.
It’s like separated. I do feel like it’s
clinging to my teeth. I don’t know. There’s gotta
be some fluoride in here. It goes down like a
milkshake, but it- just… it’s definitely
not a milkshake. This one smells good. This
one smells like a candle. Aw, that’s poop.
That’s not right. It looks like chocolate.
Not chocolate. Um… chalk. It’s good. This one’s not bad. It goes down smoothly. It’s like they took pudding-
like, warm water and let it sit. And then said,
“I present this to you.” A is definitely
my favorite. I like the taste of
that type of drink, the NutraSweet
protein shake. My favorite,
I think, is B. Oh! This is Isagenix.
Wow, I couldn’t have guessed. C. It was the only one
that I dealt with and didn’t feel like vomiting. Lean Body.
Why not? A is my favorite. Slim Fast? That’s this
one? I’m very surprised. I think this one’s the best.
It’s the smoothest and you can kind of drink it and,
like, not really think about it. This is my choice.
This one’s my choice. Special K! That- that’s the one. I’m gonna
finish it, too. Shakeology? Ohhh man.
They got a new guy in me. ♪ Shake it out, shake it out!
Ooh, ooh, ooh ♪ Y’all ain’t got the
rights to that song. So I grew up on
a dairy farm, and when cows get separated
from their mothers they have to
have colostrum, which is basically
like baby formula and it smells exactly like this.